Anger Artificially help us feel in control, when we are really out of control. Anger Falsely helps us feel Powerful when we feel Powerless. Anger is a secondary emotion that comes as a result of Hurt, Frustration or Insecurity.
Hurt = Real or Perceive Unmet Needs
Tool #1 Attack the Issue not the Person
Tool#2 How to communicate needs.
- I feel angry or hurt or disappointed when you___________________.
Frustration = Real or Perceived Unmet Expectations
Tool #1 Lean to communicate your needs or (expectations) why you feel the way you do.
Tool #2 Use the word “I desire vs I demand” We can’t make anyone do anything, but we can share our desires.
- When desires are not meet we are disappointed.
- When Demands are not meet we get anger.
Insecurity = Real or Perceived Attacks on my worth
Tool #1 Ask yourself, Why am feeling threatened.
Tool #2 We have to get our insecurity and worth from who we are in Christ not others.